Saturday, July 17, 2010

A Ph.D in love

Thought it was all in my head
and it was
But not in the way I thought
Literally
Oxytocin
They call it the cuddle hormone
What a mama releases
when she has a baby
When a man falls for a woman
When they fuck, it gets worse - Vasopressin
we'd bonded
Made it through all 3 stages
lust, attraction, attachment
and that ain't meant to break
At least not easy
It really is an addiction
The scientist called it
a motivation system
Not just an emotion
Cranked up my dopamine
And shut down my amygdala
Why I didn't fear failing
why I can't get mad at her
even though I know I should
Called it
"life's greatest prize"
Anyway, we both went through
"abandonment rage"
Then on to "frustration depression"
The failure of denial
Said you gotta see the world
for what it is
That your brain ain't gonna get
what it wants
Funny that's what's been causin' all this trouble
when that's the same thing
that wouldn't let me be satisfied
But that's because it really is in pieces
Just like my heart was
Oh well
...at least I know I am made to love
We would have made beautiful babies
---
Note to self:
Don't sleep with people you don't want to fall in love with
'cause you just might

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