Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

I have been running with sharp objects
in my mind
unintentional injury;

set them down
and go run and play

Not as simple as dry erase markers
but the same as forgiveness

Words to chew on

"You can never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete."
-Buckminister Fuller

I am very good about managing large purchases and cutting out repetitive expenses and thinking of their impact in years or decades. I need to start being as frugal with my time as I am with my money.

I don't think about time the same way that I do money. Perhaps I do not currently value it is much, but that is a topic for another day.

My father is slowly dying
Cancers grow within him
Medicine, buying time at best
I've gone home almost every week for the past three months
I just sit there on the couch
Words chained inside me
A stone rolled in front of my lips and another weighs on my heart
I sit there, just listening to ESPN and Fox News
So much to say, but I hear the TV announcers, not my own voice
we've never gone there
We don't talk about feelings
and I don't know how to now, with him

I'll be back again next week, to sit
To wait
Hoping I can speak what I feel