Juxtaposition

You can say you're sorry
but that doesn't mean anything
If the person hearing, doesn't believe it
or doesn't want to listen
I waited patiently for 2 months
for the chance to say it
and after an hour
It was clear it didn't matter:
Indifference...
ironically
there's an anger when I mention it
squirting lighter fluid on a fire
it flares right in my face
singes my eyebrows
I am not interested in the details of life
I am interested in why people choose to live
why they cry
why they smile
why their stomachs twist in knots
we don't talk about that anymore
those were conversations left
for when her head rested on my shoulder
when she mumbled her secrets in a half sleepy daze
when I offered peace
a chapter closes
---
It's a been a few weeks
and a few months before that
I called a few times recently though
just to catch up
no answer
no bother
She didn't have her phone
She was in the wilderness
doing what I'll be doing
canoeing down a lonely river
getting away from it all...
getting close to what matters
I was happy to see her name in the caller ID
I was heading home
but my cell phone doesn't have reception there
I just pull over on the side of the road
walk through the wet grass and sit down
We talked for 5 hours
as the moon slid beneath the pines
I haven't done that in years
She said the same thing
last time was when we were both freshman
She's got a new boyfriend
but nothing has really changed
we are good friends
We run together
through each others thoughts
as fast we I want
I meander
It's the difference in interstates
and old country roads
It's just natural
It's just comfortable
The way things are supposed to be
I don't have to caveat or explain
I breathe easy
These curves make us smile
That's all I needed